All Of My Tomorrows

" You may not have a tomorrow "

- unknown 

We shrug life off of our shoulders with the phrase 'I'll do it tomorrow' but when do we ever really go forth in executing our plans for life? 

You plan to read that book you bought on clearance but never do.

You plan to cook something new but when you find that you don't have a certain you tell yourself tomorrow. 

You plan to leave your house and go on a trip and yet you sit on the sofa and sleep. 

You plan to get your dream job but as soon as the going gets tough you start saying tomorrow.  

You plan to have a partner to have and to hold with kids and a house of your own and yet you're too scared to let go of a past lover.     

You plan but when do you do?

What is it going to take for you to stop planning and start doing? When will you decide that it's time for you to experience life outside of what you know? You and I, we may not have a tomorrow. Many people will today as their last and there will be no tomorrow. They will have left things unsaid and plans left undone. You and I will do this as well, but the question is, how high do you want the number of unsaid and undone? 

Life a little. Live outside of the box. Live like everyday is your last. Live until the morning sun breaks the horizon with hues of oranges and yellows and then live again.  

I implore you, stranger, to fill your life with experiences and answered questions not fears and the regret of not doing it when you had the chance.

Until we perish, Shads

The Meaning Of Us

" why are we here? "

" because we're alive "

Sometimes I think it's the eerie glow of a lone flashlight compared to inky blackness of the night that continues to bring me back. No matter how far I go I'll always find my back to the source of light.

Sometimes I think there's something in the asphalt used to pave the roads I drive on that continues to bring me back. I always find myself looking down the road wondering where it will take me next.

Sometimes I think there's something in the flour I use to sprinkle the pastry dough. It keeps me coming back wondering what I could use it to make next. 

Sometimes I think it's the thump of the bass pressing into my chest that continues to bring me back to the music. The smell of pyrotechnics mixed with liquor is a smell I know best and it brings me home.  

Sometimes I think it's the endless opportunities that keeps the dream of life thriving. The feeling of doing something you never would have done otherwise. The feeling of breaking out of the normal day to day routine we have found ourselves trapped inside of.

But what keeps you from coming back again and again? Mortgage? No money? No friends? No time? Too old? Too young? There's a million reasons to stop someone from pursuing a life that they desire but in this case it's just you, isn't it? You're scared. Scared of what's going to happen. Scared of where your money is gonna go. Fear stops so many people from doing such great things. Fear has stopped me as well. Many things I wanted to do but I feared judgment, injury, a scolding. Fear has ruined many things until one day I realised that I am my fear.

But fear does not control me. I control fear.

And because I control it, I am no longer bored. I stepped outside of my six by six box and into a whole new world I never thought existed beyond the cardboard. It started with a simple dish I cooked in the kitchen to climbing into stone covered holes in the ground because I wanted to know where it went. I have become a person of plans, not dreams. A person of satisfaction instead of crippling curiosity. Though I will admit, curiosity never dies off.

Fear was normal. Fear molded us in boxes that continued a day by day without another thought.
Break the sense of normal. Control fear. Become the person you want to be.

Onwards Until We Perish

- Shads